I have a dream

One of my favourite photographs, ever, is this 1975 Helmut Newton shot of le smoking for French Vogue. I love the androgynous model, the mood, the composition and the ambiguity of this picture - a quiet Parisienne street after dark, what/who is she waiting for? And it captures a moment in the seventies when Yves Saint Laurent's revolutionary vision collided with Newton's powerful photography. In The Beautiful Fall, Alicia Drake says, 'Newton provided a link in the creation of the Saint Laurent visual world; thanks to Newton's imagination you could actually 'see' the Saint Laurent woman in action and witness the decadence and adventure of her life.'

At the time, the image caused a sensation, as the fabulous Colin McDowell points out in Fashion Today, 'Nice women did not wear the ambiguous smokings of Yves Saint Laurent.... And yet, both suit and image were an homage to the new female elegance - years before their time.'

This is the kind of elegance That's Not My Age aspires to. Grown-up and edgy, I've always longed for a YSL tuxedo. Unfortunately, I'm not a sixteenth arrondisement bourgeoise woman with too much money and time on my hands (how Helmut Newton described the way his ideal YSL-clad woman dressed). Though I have visited the Pierre Bergé - Yves Saint Laurent Foundation in Paris, where on a behind the scenes tour of the archives I actually got to see the original le smoking, a very special fashion moment indeed, almost as exciting as meeting Mary Portas. But that's as close as it gets. Or is it?

I've spotted this YSL wool-blend tuxedo on The Outnet (yes, yes, I know I've become completely obsessed with that birthday deal but imagine it, two quid for a tuxedo!)



And in homage to my middle-age crush - that's Tilda Swinton, not Mary Portas (though Mary in a tux - now that would be Portas-tic!) - I might actually opt for a cream pants suit:





Tuxedo love: Yves Saint Laurent with Catherine Deneuve in 2002.


PS If you haven't read The Beautiful Fall - a book about the rivalry between YSL and Karl Lagerfeld, about 'Fashion, genius and glorious excess in 1970s Paris' - I can highly recommend it. Brilliant stuff.



And don't forget....TheOutnet.com is throwing a very special birthday party, for one day only on April 16th the online fashion outlet will host a pop-up sale where all items will be available at the giveaway price of $1/£1/€1. For more information, www.theoutnet/birthday.com

Photos
Yves Saint Laurent and Catherine Deneuve: The Beautiful Fall
Tilda Swinton: ES Magazine

The chicest hamper in the world

The Chanel hamper may be sitting in my virtual fashion bin but it's not been forgotten. Oh no. Armchair research tells me that the wicker basket with the double C logo is actually a pétanque bag, on sale for one thousand seven hundred and seventy English pounds. Here it is in the latest issue of Vogue with a very helpful fashion sum:


One Chanel pétanque bag - the boules = the chicest picnic hamper in the world.

I'm sorry, even if it were handcrafted by fairies and contained the Kaiser's own boules, I still wouldn't pay nearly two grand for it, not when you can buy this luxury willow picnic hamper with oiled leather straps - and all its contents - for a mere £99 from John Lewis:



Do the fashion math and make that £1671 - the chicest saving in the world!


What do you think Karl Lagerfeld should do with his boules?

Date Night

A big fan of 30 Rock, That's Not My Age can't wait to see Date Night with Tina Fey, Steve Carell and a topless Mark Wahlberg. On making the movie, the self-effacing writer/producer/funny woman says:

'I've got big gym teacher legs from being pigeon-toed all my life. And I can't wear heels because I have buniony feet. Pitiful..... But I did try to get in shape. Me in that movie is my version of being in shape. Any other actress would hang herself.'

When Mr & Mrs That's Not My Age go on a date, it's quite a low-key affair - you won't catch me pole-dancing in a corset, or a sharp-suited Mr TNMA mobilising Air Force One to take me to a Broadway show. The Blog Widower usually pulls on a clean shirt and I have been known to accessorize my trademark t-shirt and jeans with diamanté earrings. This week taking my cue from the talented Tina Fey, I will be wearing my Breton top, and this neat tailored jacket:



Who knows I might even break out the sparkly earrings! What would you wear for a grown-up date night?


Credits
Tina Fey and Steve Carell photo: OK Magazine
Quote: The Stylist
Marc by Marc Jacobs jacket: The Outnet



TheOutnet.com is throwing a very special birthday party, for one day only on April 16th the online fashion outlet will host a pop-up sale where all items will be available at the giveaway price of $1/£1/€1. For more information www.theoutnet.com/birthday

Wanted: a new holiday wardrobe

Ta da.... the first photograph of That's Not My Age, that hasn't been decapitated. Thankfully the sunglasses and hat are disguise enough. Here I am in Italy last year wearing my favourite holiday vest. A ribbed cotton halter neck from Jigsaw, 15 years old or thereabouts, that has travelled all around the world with me (don't worry I'm not going to bore you with the rest of the holiday snaps). This trusty top, faded by the sun and worn to death is the first thing I pack, every summer.

Having just got back from our tripette to Turkey, it's only natural that I'm contemplating the next vacation. And this year, I've been thinking that maybe it's time to find another reliable vest top before my Jigsaw number completely disintegrates. So I spent the afternoon conducting research on t'internet - whilst Mr TNMA got on with the holiday laundry - and found this gorgeous Chloé tank on The Outnet:



And then of course I just had to find a complete holiday wardobe to go with it. To travel in; bleached jeans, a lovely safari-style jacket and woven leather wedge sandals. Despite the fact that grey marl track pants are on trend and far more comfy, you'll never catch me slouching around Heathrow in a pair. I always travel in jeans.





For the beach, I'll be needing a kaftan - and the longer, the better. At my age, coverage is the name of the game, though I do still wear a bikini, having perfected my sun lounger to sea dash (sadly more like Dudley Moore than Bo Derek in '10'). And finally, I'll take a new pair of sunglasses. My holiday snap is out there for the world to see, I wouldn't want to get recognised now, would I?







Chloé knot detail tank, Acne jeans, Miu Miu cotton jacket, Belle by Sigerson Morrison sandals, Melissa Odabash zebra stripe kaftan and bikini and Chloé sunglasses all from The Outnet.



TheOutnet.com is throwing a very special birthday party, for one day only on April 16th the online fashion outlet will host a pop-up sale where all items will be available at the giveaway price of $1/£1/€1. For more information www.theoutnet.com/birthday



Do you have a favourite holiday item?

The world in vogue

On a recent tripette, to Istanbul, Mr and Mrs That's Not My Age found; gorgeous ceramic baubles, trinkets, beautiful mosques, pomegranates by the cartload, as well as modern cafés, bars, boutique hotels and the latest edition to the Condé Nast stable, Turkish Vogue - with famous Turkish model, Jessica Stam on the cover. Now, I'll say no more about that little cultural conundrum but the Jezebel website sums it up nicely here....



Look beyond the cover and there's a lovely feature listing twentieth century Vogue fashion shoots in Turkey. Shot by the likes of Cecil Beaton, Irving Penn and David Bailey - so what if the cover of the first issue was photographed in New York by Patrick Demarchelier?






We took a trip to Istanbul Modern, apparently named after the Tate in London but in a serious case of of one-upmanship, this museum has a painted, red carpet leading up to the entrance. Oh how we enjoyed our little stroll along the walkway of fame - and are even thinking of recreating the look in the entrance to our apartment block.




We discovered that the Turkish are animal lovers. There are more cats in Istanbul than mosques, and on our sightseeing tour we encountered a pack of wild dogs and a very clever Easter bunny:



According to the Financial Times, Turkey has the potential to be like Milan in five years time, well, they already have the maniac car drivers and the smog. Aside from being European city of culture 2010, Turkey has it's own fashion week with loads of talented designers including Tween and Desa. (Click here to read ace blogger Disney Roller Girl's piece on Tween), designer stores and shopping malls (which we didn't visit, this was a cultural visit, after all) - and the provocatively named boutique, Midnight Express which stocks Turkish designer Bora Aksu (who shows at London/Paris fashion weeks), and has a fine line in slogan t-shirts:





But our favourite shops were the junk shops in Beyoglu - where we discovered how rubbish we were at haggling - and paid over the odds for our only souvenir:



A globe without a stand (to add to our collection, more on this coming soon). The man in the shop claimed the hanging globe was his idea but a little trip to the Pera Museum told us otherwise:






Do you have any tips on haggling? If so, please share them. And what's your favourite holiday souvenir?

Combat Rock

That's Not My Age is loving the spécial militaire edition of French Vogue (March issue) - which in a timely fashion ties in nicely with last weekend's wardrobe workout chez nous. Tired of wearing the same Uniqlo jeans over and over, and with an assault course for a wardrobe - I sanctioned a ruthless closet cull. And Mr TNMA was my commander-in-chief. Four pairs of trainers, two dresses, three skirts, one kaftan, a linen tunic, one pair of jeans, one pair of smart trousers, a tank top, cotton blouse, quilted-down-filled gilet (taking up far to much space and I needed to make room for 'the beast' ie my leopard print coat) and two pairs of shoes have all been donated to my local charity shop. Mary Portas will be proud!

One thing I discovered during Operation Fashion Kill, was an awful lot of khaki. Perfect for this season's military look but how to wear it without looking like Madonna in Malawi? Unfortunately, I didn't uncover a Chanel jacket so for an easy daytime look I teamed an old pair of Topshop silk combats with a grey marl t-shirt, statement necklace and olive green leather kitten heels. Some people call this 'shopping your wardrobe,' That's Not My Age prefers to call it getting dressed.



In reality the daytime outfit will probably look something like this....



For a smarter look, I paired the combats with a pale gold DKNY jacket and killer shoes (these are from Tod's and I'm desperately trying not to think about cost per wear as I bought them for a wedding two years ago and have worn them, er hem, twice.) Towards the end of Operation Fashion Kill, we were feeling battle weary and my commander-in-chief was losing the will to live, hence the haphazard photos:



I noticed that the slinky silk combats are wearing thin across the backside, they may not survive another season but this shouldn't be a problem - That's Not My Age has military back-up:



So, our mission over I bring you the grown-up guide to military chic:


1. Give khaki a glamourous spin by piling on the jewellery.



2. Don't take the trend too literally, go head-to-toe and you could end up looking like this....



3. Keep hair and make-up sleek. Think well-groomed and gorgeous, not grungy (definitely a case of do as I say, not as I do!)




And if you're looking for some extras to go with your combat pants how about:








Metal chain necklace, Jaeger. Khaki t-shirt and leather bag both Jigsaw. Cork wedges, Stella McCartney at Matches and tan leather 'pistol' boots, Acne at Net-a-Porter.

Over and out.


Photos
Fashion images: French Vogue
Victoria Beckham: mirror.co.uk